Emptiness

I have really dragged my feet on posting this week.  I was in Minnesota visiting my dad & uncle, and my sis in the hospital.  She is making progress, but of course everyone wants it to be faster, and complete healing will take a very long time.  It is so sad to see her suffer so much, but we are so very happy she is still with us.  Yesterday I tried catching up on things around the house, and took a wonderful, refreshing walk under our big sky, being in awe once again of the beauty only God can create.

Yesterday, and again this morning, my mood was dark and my emotions were fragile.  I knew I needed to be in church this morning, but it took all my resolve to get myself ready and get there.  Back in 1964, a song was written with the lyrics "Fill my cup, Lord, I lift it up, Lord . . . "  It taught me a great lesson, that when I feel most empty, God can fill me again, but first, I have to offer myself to Him for filling.  Time and time again, I go along in my own strength, doing whatever I need or want to do, until my strength is gone.

When we are exhausted and overly stressed, black clouds seem to hover right around our heads, sometimes taking over our every thought and word.  The remedy often is simple rest, and nourishing food.  (Man or woman does not live by sugar and caffeine alone!)  Advertisers tempt us with food that really shouldn't be called food, leaving our appetites little room for protein, fruit, and vegetables. In the midst of our strong-willed determination to be and do all that we can be and do, we can so easily forget the basics.  Wisdom tells us what we need, but wisdom is often ignored.

Thankfully, God can also give us wisdom!  The New Testament writer James says, if we lack wisdom, we should ask God, who gives generously, without finding fault.  That's a big relief to me, since asking someone else for help often results in judgement, and even condemnation. 

The exchange of fullness for emptiness, in emotional and spiritual realms, doesn't necessarily come instantly, just as it doesn't when in need of physical food.  Therefore, it would be wise to prepare ahead of time, and to partake regularly, in order to avoid those times of complete emptiness.  Using ourselves up requires longer recovery.  I'm learning my lesson at this moment.  If you need the same, will you begin with me?